How are you?

That's the burning question these days... sometimes I have enough energy to answer honestly but most of the time I say, 'good'. I'm not exactly lying when I say 'good' because technically, isn't everyone 'good' as long as they are standing upright and breathing? The honest answer is the only option when I'm writing in my journal/blog so here it goes: I'm on the edge of sanity, sprinkled with some excitement and layered with uncertainty. I like order, I crave organization, and I need things to be completed chronologically. I can't seem to find any balance right now. The pressure is high and even when I'm sleeping; I am worrying about SOMETHING. I've been so irrational that Kevin has come close to shaking me, trying to get me to focus before I spin out. He and I have had a few verbal matches and it is obvious, to both of us, that we are often not angry about the topic of discussion; we are just choosing to use anger to convey the frustration we may feel about other things. I've told Kevin repeatedly that I am so glad we like each other 😂 because I would never choose to move to an island in the middle of nowhere with anyone else. In the spirit of letting this blog assist me with my emotions and keep me centered, I am going to randomly list the things that I still have to do. With any luck, when I reread this post in a week or two, I will be able to laugh at the Melissa of June 26th and say, 'geez, that girl needs to CHILL'!

• Change the address and look into Zeus's microchip to see if it would cover him in Europe.

• Go back to Horry Electric to re-sign a cancellation of the electrical service since I accidentally turned it off a month too soon (Kev was not impressed 😅).

• Scan and email the itemized packing lists (that are not done yet, hopefully tomorrow) to the terminal that is shipping our two crates of household goods/tools to the Azores.

• Scan and email our citizenship documents and declarations to the shipping coordinator for the crates being sent overseas.

• Find patience - beg, borrow or steal it - in order to continue waiting and praying that John from Sata Airlines gets us an affordable estimate to bring Zeus as in-flight cargo to Portugal with us. Apparently the Dog Carrier we chose ($1200usd plus tax and shipping, that has NOT yet been ordered), is approved but the estimate and date confirmation (hoping for September 7th 🤞🏻) is still up in the air (ha! get it, up in the air as in our flight details 😂😅😩).

• Pack for New York, I haven't done that yet and I need to because I am really excited to go to Broadway with my nephew. It is a much-needed vacation and the experience of a lifetime; t-minus 4 days and counting!

• Return the internet modem! I cannot forget this because they will charge soooo much money for that stupid thing AND I have to do the factory reset on the TV's in the house considering they are smart TVs logged onto all of our streaming subscriptions and they are staying with the house for the new owner (Josh, you promised you would remind of this one!).

• Post Kevin's Mercedes for sale this week. Tomorrow, the seats are being recovered and then we are going to put it up for auction with a reserve that Kevin is comfortable with and just SEE if there is a buyer on this side of the border. If the reserve is NOT met within a week at auction, we will continue with the original plan to trailer it to Canada, import it (taxes and all), and keep it stored for a length of time. Kevin may not want it to sell but I think everyone out there reading this knows that I am hoping for the opposite.

• Take down the hoist. This is more of a Kevin to-do-list item but he has asked for my help and right now, my free time is being scheduled by the quarter-hour.

• There aren't too many things left at work that I need to accomplish but I do want to make notes on all open files/quotes/bills etc. Just something as a reference for whomever will be left with my duties to be able to pick-up where I left off.

• Vacuum, this makes the list albeit not at the top of the priorities, because aside from the main areas of the house, we have failed to look after the spare rooms and the blinds (yes, I vacuum the blinds. I do not believe I am the only one - its easier with the extended arm - you should try it before you judge me).

I think that's it. I hope that's it. I am praying THAT. IS. IT.

I don't have to listen to my brain to know how stressed I am because my body screams at me everyday: my shoulders are in knots, I have needed to poop (twice) in the time that it took to write this post, my cortisol levels are through the roof, evidenced by my incontrollable need to consume sugar and I have started to have nightmares (the other night, I woke up terrified that I had head lice again, as an adult, in the midst of this chaos 😱). I have had so many loved ones reach out to offer support and assistance and I appreciate it, I really do but I would never burden anyone with these nit-picky things especially since this is all our own doing. We are the one's who decided to move continents, we are the one's pushing to have our belongings and our almost-ten-year-old dog come with us and we are the one's taking the leap of faith in starting a new life on an island. With great risk could sometimes come some sort of reward (put that on a bumper sticker!).